Thinking Out Loud
by BluiePenguin
Summary: He thought they would live together far beyond their adolescent years, love each other until death. But one accident sent her to heaven, and he's left behind, alone without her love and her smile to get him through to the end. (This is for EsteVamp4998's Writing Challenge!)


**A/N: 1,887 words. The song for this story is Thinking Out Loud by Ed Sheeran. I hope you will enjoy the story!**

* * *

Natsu remembers when he had written the song.

It was two years after the Tenroujima incident. Less crazy things have been happening then, and so Natsu found the time to confess his love for Lucy. A few months passed and Lucy's birthday was finally near.

Natsu had his face planted on the bar, and had not moved for a while.

"Yo, flame-brain," Gray greeted, sitting down next to him. "Up for a fight?" he asked, not expecting much as he was smart enough to notice that Natsu didn't seem too energetic that day.

"No. Shut up. I'm trying to think," Natsu growled out, his voice muffled.

"Alright then. I'll be on a mission. Lucy's birthday is coming soon, you know."

"I. Know," Natsu said, clearly annoyed.

"I see. So you're being like this because you haven't gotten anything for Lucy yet?"

"YES!" Natsu jumped up, fuming. His eyes were wild but instantly became fearful when he spotted the walking suit of armor in front of him. Anger gone, he stammered, "I-I mean, aye!" he squeaked and gulped when Erza began to crack her knuckles.

Originally wanting to teach Natsu a lesson, Erza changed her mind and instead said, "I hope you will not repeat this."

"Aye!"

"So, do you need my help on getting Lucy a present?" Without waiting for an answer, she continued, "I suggest you bake her a big cake."

Wendy had been listening in and she sweatdropped at Erza's idea. She said timidly, "Um, Erza-san...I think you'd like that gift more than she would. Natsu-san, maybe you should give her a book, she likes to read, doesn't she?"

"Yeah, but I want to get her something she would never expect to get from me."

"I think you should get her favorite flowers and fancy chocolate!" Mirajane suggested, eyes shining. "Since you're as dense as a rock, she'll never expect you to get her something so romantic!"

"Yeah, but that's something a boyfriend would get for his girlfriend. This is her birthday..."

"Exactly!" Mirajane exclaimed brightly. "After giving her the gifts, you can confess!"

"Huh," Gray snorted. "Didn't think you would know what a boyfriend and a girlfriend are, dense boy."

"Hey! I'm not that dense!" Natsu retorted.

"Yes, you are, Natsu. Lucy has come to me so many times saying that her advances towards you had gone completely unnoticed," Mirajane told him, sighing.

"What advances?"

"My point exactly. She would flirt with you, and be subtle enough that Romeo could pick up on it a little. But you, Natsu, you didn't even notice a single one."

"She...flirts with me?!"

"Yeah, that's freaking crazy, isn't it!" Gray said sarcastically.

"So, she likes me?" Natsu asked, still a little confused.

"Yes," everyone who had been listening deadpanned in unison.

"So, do you like Lucy?" Happy joined in the conversation.

"I..." Natsu started and stopped. He didn't know what like or love really was.

"I guess you need my services!" Mirajane clapped, just happy to hear that her pairing was _finally _getting some progress to becoming real. "Do you feel butterflies in your stomach when she looks at you?"

"Well, sometimes..."

"Tell me about Lucy."

"Okay. She's really nice, really kind and would sacrifice herself for her spirits, family and friends, and even a stranger, she's really passionate, she's really independent, she cooks the best meals, she really cares for her spirits and fights alongside her spirits unlike other Celestial Spirit Mages, she can be easily scared sometimes, but she would fight for the guild and her spirits no matter what, she's really smart, stubborn and won't give up and she always keeps her promises."

By the time he was finished, everyone in the guild was listening and gaping at him. A few moments later, Mirajane recovered and squealed loudly, making the dragon slayers wince and cover their ears. "That was so cute!" she gushed.

"Really...?" Natsu wondered, confused as to why his little speech had garnered so much attention.

"Of course! You do like her, Natsu!" Mirajane cheered.

"I...like her?!" Natsu turned a deep red.

"Did you even listen to yourself, fireplace? Of course you do!" Gray said.

Ignoring the insult, Natsu stood in shock. '_I like Lucy... I guess this makes sense, since I feel some weird attraction to her scent and keep wanting to get into her bed to inhale more of her... And I keep feeling an urge to bite her and leave my mark on her..._'

"So, Natsu, what _are_ you going to get for her?"

That question broke Natsu out of his thoughts and he blinked and groaned. "That's just it, I don't know."

"Actually, flame-crap, I think I have an idea."

"Well, spit it out!"

"Geez, take a chill pill. I think she'd like to be serenaded."

"Sere...what?"

Gray facepalmed. "You know, have a song sang and dedicated to her. By you."

"Hey, that's an amazing idea! I've heard her hum quite a lot on missions!" Natsu grinned, not having felt this happy in a while. A moment later, his grin fell. "...But I don't know what to write."

"I'm happy to help! But you'll have to come up with all the lyrics yourself."

"Just great..." Natsu pouted, but sighed. '_I guess I do like Lucy. I would have needed someone to persuade me to write this song and _sing _in front of someone other than her._'

* * *

That day had been very special to him and still is. It was the day he realized he liked, no, loves her. A week later, it was her birthday and when he had finished singing, she had never looked happier.

* * *

Lucy hummed as she walked out of her bathroom, fresh from the shower. Suddenly, her sixth sense told her that someone was in her apartment and she narrowed her eyes. She strongly suspected it was one of the members of Team Natsu or a burglar. Either way, she was not happy.

She turned around and saw someone on her bed. It was Natsu, and he was holding a guitar. Shocked, she moved forward slowly and stopped when he started to play.

He sang a beautiful song.

"_When your legs don't work like they used to before, and I can't sweep you off of your feet, will you mouth still remember the taste of my love, will your eyes still smile from your cheeks..._"

...but some lines stuck out to her the most and made her teary-eyed.

"_...come into my lovin' arms, kiss me under the light of a thousand stars, place your head on my beating heart, I'm thinking out loud, maybe, we found love right where we are..._"

When he finished, she whispered, "...Natsu..."

"Happy Birthday, Luce," he said, grinning.

"Natsu...have you noticed I'm still in my towel?"

"Wh-oh..." Natsu blushed. "Sorry, I'll leave right now-"

"No, it's fine," Lucy laughed. She stopped and asked him, "But did you really mean what you sang in that song?"

"Yeah... I love you, Lucy," Natsu finally mumbled out, looking away and blushing deeply.

Lucy was shocked, again. She knew the meaning of the song, but she didn't think it would be because Natsu held actual romantic feelings towards her. She smiled and tears slipped from her eyes again. "I love you too, Natsu."

"...So... do we kiss?"

She rolled her eyes and smiled. "Yeah."

She walked to him and leaned in, and he closed the distance between them by pressing his lips against hers. For a few seconds they were hesitant, but they became more confident and even added a little tongue. They finally broke apart and smiled at each other.

"So, what do you think of my present?"

"The only present better than this is a proposal from you."

"Let's not talk that far just yet," Natsu laughed and so did Lucy.

* * *

He thought they would be together until they were seventy. No, beyond seventy. He would still fall as hard for her at a hundred.

But of course, some things aren't meant to be.

"It's not fair..." he whispers, punching the tree softly. "IT'S NOT _FAIR_!" he roars, his fist igniting with flames and making contact with the tree at full force. He doesn't care about the damage he just caused. What matters anymore? His mate is gone, and dragon slayer or not, he could only have Lucy in his life, and now Lucy is...gone. Just gone. Simple as that yet heartbreaking as hell.

No one will ever understand his pain. No one loved her the way he did, the way he does. No one saved her life so many times only to fail this one stupid time. No one watched her die. No one watched her burn to death due to the weak flames from another random mage. A mage they were supposed to defeat together. They were supposed to return to the guild alive, laughing and happy. They were supposed to live until they were really old.

But no, she was taken away at the young age of twenty-one.

"Why?" he asks, voice hoarse. He's been shouting for so long. "Why her? Couldn't you have taken someone else? Couldn't you have taken that stupid weakling fire mage wannabe's life?!" He knows he's being selfish for thinking that, and he knows Lucy wouldn't want him to be like this, but like hell he cares about that now.

"Natsu..." he recognizes the voice. It came from Gray.

He doesn't turn around, and instead just stares at the ground. He knows Erza, Gray and Happy have emerged from the trees by just smelling their scents. He'll never smell her scent again. He'll never hear her laugh, see her smile, see her at her happiest when he gets down on one knee and pulls out a ring, and he'll remember the horrified face she had when she was being burnt to death.

He smells their salty tears. There are a lot of them.

"'Come to the...funeral."

How dare she?

"Why?" he hisses.

"...To send her off."

"No."

"Natsu..."

"I already saw her burn to death, touched her ashes...and you're asking me this?"

"Lucy will...appreciate it," Happy says in between his crying.

"Just be there," Gray says curtly. He turns around and walks away.

Natsu stands there for a few moments, takes a shuddering breath and follows Erza and Happy to the place of the funeral.

Her grave is somewhere he knows she would like. He suggested it, and that had been the last time he had spoken to anyone. It's near Lisanna's 'grave' on a cliff. Sometimes they would just sit and talk about things near the edge of the cliff. Her grave is right on the spot she sat.

During the entire funeral, he doesn't pay any attention. He waits until everyone has left, and has to wait until after sunset when Erza, Gray, Happy and Levy have finally left.

Natsu sits himself down on the spot where he always sits and sighs. He looks to his right where an urn sits. It holds her. He puts one arm around it and stares up at the sky. It looks especially pretty that night with all the twinkling stars.

"_Maybe, we found love right where we are_," he sings and tears begin to fall down again. He curses them loudly before finally giving in and sobbing.

Natsu Dragneel will never truly be the same.

* * *

**A/N: I hope the ending isn't too cheesy. :/ Also, I don't know much about ashes and urns and all that so I might have gotten that wrong. **


End file.
